Wednesday, August 31, 2011.

♥ Dilemma

Been trapped in the blue phase for quite some time.
I'm not sure why I'm turning like this- moody, pessimistic, despondent.
It's not what I want either.
But sometimes, others may not be able to understand. I know how annoying it feels to always have someone throw a wet blanket back at you even when you're nice and offer to encourage him/her.

I feel like I'm changing, but whether it's a good change or not I really don't know.
It's a misty sight in front of me, I know not of my future.
It's always a step at a time.
With uncertainty and risk.
It's not a very nice feeling either.

Right now, i'm struggling in the transition stage.
I can simply throw the towel in and give up.
Or I can choose to move on.
It's very extreme.
But I can't help it.
My mind's in a whirl and everything around me seems very hostile. And unfamiliar.
Maybe that's what they say by the term 'getting out of one's comfort zone'.

I really feel like giving up, though I don't like the feeling of failure.
I seriously don't.
I'm still struggling to accept the true fact that I gave up something I like. For something that's good and seems practical and a more safe option.
It's not easy trying to maintain my balance in the previous course.
Much less jumping to another totally different environment.
And don't know how to share these feelings with. Hmm.

There's nice people around who offer to help, yes i agree,
but ultimately it depends on how strong your will is.
If you have a weak will, nothing's gonna work out at the end of the day.
And I'm exactly in this situation now.
I don't know why I'm even studying.
For future prospects? For stability and security? That it's part and parcel of life? But..
Yeah true.

I'm just rambling here cos I need a channel to let these feelings out.
Tomorrow's a long day.
Not sure how I'll handle it but hopefully i'll survive it.
Life at this point is seriously bad.
To think I still say that my next 10 years is going to be very exciting as I'll be moving on from a student to a working adult.
And yet I'm already stuck at my first step outwards.
Sigh.

Till then.


I'm lost.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011.

♥ Mixed feelings and a promise to myself.

I know..
that I've made a huge decision recently.
Till now, I'm still wondering how I mustered the courage to make such a choice.


Can't quite express how I'm exactly feeling right now. A mixture of relief and sadness and anticipation, i suppose?



It's strange that something I like becomes something that stresses me out too much.



Perhaps liken to the advice I read from a book:


"A huge sign that you've found your true calling is that you're a little bit afraid of it. There will be pleasure and pain- pleasure because you love it and it makes you happy, and pain because the stakes are so high. When it's about your heart's desire, failure becomes scarier. You care. It's your work. Your purpose. Own it." -The Amazing Adventures of Working Girl by Karen Burns



... I was overwhelmed by that fear at that moment and so I took the u-turn. It seems like a coward's act, but at that point of time, the stress/fear/pressure... those feelings were something that you cannot really understand unless you've been through it first-hand.



I did not regret coming out of it, but at times, I can't help feeling a bit nostalgic about the time I spent doing things there, although it was only for a week. It's afterall my interest, so I guess feeling that tinge of sadness that I'm moving away from my dream remains an inevitable fact. The fact that I cannot be an architect anymore. I can never forget how thrilled I was when I knew that I was accepted into this course back then. It's a very special feeling. But life is never smooth-sailing all the time.. some people take ages to reach their goals.. it all depends. I might have to take a longer route, but it's not necessarily bad. This is just the start of my life. I've a long way to go on and I'm not stopping because of this setback.



It hurts, but I look forward to my life in another new environment. It may not be easy; it's definitely not easy, but I'll try.



Another career advice by the working girl:



"It's never too late to be the person you were meant to be"






And, on the last note, I'm gonna make myself a promise here. I am not leaving my interior design dream forever. I'll be back! Even if it takes me forever to get there. That's how passionate I am about it. I know that after coming out from the current course, my route towards interior design related careers will become even harder. I might face more difficulties. I might not get there. But I'll still try. Try at a time when I feel I'm more mature and ready to embrace it. I can start reading up on materials related to interior design, talk to professionals, provide free labour in exchange for experience, anything. And anyway, I need not be an interior designer.. I can work for something that keeps me close to interior design. Or even, I can try to incorporate what I learnt in my new course together with my knowledge in design to make something impressive. Anything is possible.







I believe I can reach there one day.







If you happen to pass by my blog and see this post, please support me! Your encouragement will be deeply appreciated.








Right now, I think I still need some time to adjust to the changes. I know I'm not very good at managing changes. Plus all the feelings that I have no idea who I can share it with and decided to leave them here, I feel that time is what I need now to help me strike a balance.







Till then, hope I'll be happier the next time I come here.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010.

♥ 4 more days.

Sigh.
Life hasn't been great lately. Especially now. Im feeling so stressed up but I don't know who to talk to. And I don't know what to do. How sad can life get.

Stress.

Thursday, January 21, 2010.

♥ 21 January 2010

Just realised CNY's less than a month! :O
Time flies-
too quickly.

Anyways, just a quick one..

Bought some art&craft stuff @ ArtFriend sometime ago..


Just started..

Halfway through..Completed! :D
It wasn't really what I wanted to show, but it came as a pleasant surprise eventually.
And I'm so proud of myself! Lols.

But I want to learn this! :D
(Not my work though, they are my inspirations!)



I've always wanted to create a dream house of my own.
A cosy one.
A unique one.
:D

Wednesday, January 6, 2010.

♥ 5 January 2010


Happy Birthday to Me!

Thank you to all who made it memorable. :D

Friday, January 1, 2010.

♥ 1 January 2010


... is loves! :D

.

♥ 1 January 2010


新的一年又到了。
有一点不舍，也有一点的期待。

倒数前几天，我一直在想，在2010 年里我到底想怎么好好的过？
有很多想要学的东西，有很多我想做的事情，
但，就是做不完。

我的新年新希望跟以往有点不一样
以前的我，一直都很想达成这个，学学那个，
总相信我应该把时间铺得满满的才会是最充足的。
所以，愿望越来越多。
是完成了不少。

但今年的我，只想往一些目标前进。
毕竟，没有人是完美的。

1] 专心，努力地战胜A水准！
2] 瘦下5kg，一定要比以前更健康，结实！
3] 不要一直和过去拉扯着，要勇敢往前走！
4] 珍惜所有，懂得感恩！
5] 跟着自己心里的感觉走。
2010年，新年快乐！


Tuesday, December 29, 2009.

♥ 29 December 2009


Since young, we've been playing with toys.
The ones we love.
The ones that give us a clue on how the future is like.
The ones that hint us what kind of careers we are looking for.
Doctors, teacher, policeman, fireman, nurse, supervisor, f&b, etc.

(:

Wednesday, December 23, 2009.

♥ 23 December 2009

保留当初最美好的记忆，才回事以后最美丽的回忆。

.

♥ 23 December 2009

Hate it when I have so much to say, but don't know where to start and who to share with.

Sunday, December 20, 2009.

♥ 20 December 2009

有好多好多好多的话想说，却总是不知该如何开始。
结果，全都往自己内心深处躲着。
也只有自己知道。

(:

Friday, December 18, 2009.

♥ 18 December 2009

Unknowingly, our actions affect one another's thinking.

Thursday, December 17, 2009.

♥ 17 December 2009

That's how I feel to know that you lied.

How long does it take for one to forgive another who lied?
Is forgiveness possible here?
Or will it just remain a flaw of that person's character forever?
Why, when given the chance to speak the truth, we chose to hide it with lies?

So, can I still trust you?
I really don't know. When I attempted to let it go, I realised I couldn't forget that image of you lying your way through.
Maybe it takes time to cover up all these, but it's a fact that it has once happened before.

Anyways,
to human is to err.
Maybe I shouldn't harp on this issue anymore and start moving on.
This is just part and parcel of life.
Nobody's at fault here, perhaps the environment we live in is.
------
If all of us had been more clear-cut and understanding, we might not have to live in a life of lies and uncertainties.

Monday, December 14, 2009.

♥ 14 December 2009

What happens when something you cherish
is not of significance to another?

.

♥ 14 December 2009







Nice songs from Momo Love :D

Saturday, December 12, 2009.

♥ 7-11 December 2009


For the past 5 days..
I was with the children.
And it's a rather mix of feelings.
But definitely a new experience.

3d2n camp @ NIE
Camp with over 30+ children from Mon to Wed with 3 other volunteers. (:
Jing Yi, Chen Teng, and Julian.
Didn't regret it, in fact, I enjoyed it.
I always felt so comfortable with these kids.
Cos they wouldn't hide their feelings when they talk to you.
And at times, what they say can really amuse you. :D

---
(Random chatting before bathing)
Girl A: Hey you know, I'm wearing the slippers of the same size as my Mum.. I'm wearing an adult shoe!
Girl B: Wah, you feet like ELEPHANT eh.

---
(In the midst of a game, I think)
Boy A: Okay I give you one chance.
Jing Yi: Huh, one chance only ah.
Boy A: (thinking for a while) Okay, I give you three chances.
---
(Chatting)
Jing Yi: Guess how old we are...
Boy B: (answering very seriously) Hmm, honestly you look like 21...
Me: Me leh? (Anticipative)
Boy B: (still very serious) You look like.... 28
Me: !!!

---
(Before bedtime, trying to get the girls to sleep)
Me: Okay.. when I say 1,2,3.. you all say good night to each other okay!
Me: 1...2...3...!
Girls: G-o-o-d n-i-g-h-t~ to each other!

...and then they chit chatted again! ):

---

(On the way back to NIE from WCP)
Me: You know, I'm 26 years old already..
Boy C & Girl C: Really?
Me: Yup, and I got a son, 2 years old this year.
Boy C & Girl C: Then you den den den den already? (The wedding song)
Me: Yup
Boy C & Girl C: Then you wedding must invite me okay..
Me: Okay, but you must give me an angbao
Boy C & Girl C: Okay, I give you $50 angbao... (serious look)
Me: $50 not enough.. I treat you mac then you give me $50 bucks okay. :D

---

(On the bus)
Me: Hey, teach me how to play Hamburger!
Girl D: (teaching) Hamburger, hamburger, ham ham ham! Sausage, chilli... COCONUT
Volunteers: Huh? Hamburger got coconut one? Is it scramble egg? Lol.
---
(A sweet surprise)
Julian: (opens our bunk door) Hey, go in go in! Don't be shy! (encouraging)
Boy C: (blushes and ran away for a few times)

after a while...
Boy C: (came inside and sang Heal the World very seriously to us!)
JY/CT/Me: (Claps) Very nice!
Boy C: (Shy again and ran off)

---
(Supper time!)
Boy E: (curious) Why you never eat the biscuits?
Me: Because I brushed my teeth already... and I kicked the habit of eating supper already.. I'm very fat also. (shows him my fat arm!) So I shouldn't eat so much.
Boy E: Huh, eat biscuits will fat meh. I eat alot also very thin. (Giggles and continues eating)
---

And many more memorable moments with them. :D
I've also learnt alot from this camp, made new friends too.

To sum up everything..

5 things I've learnt:
1. That I can actually lead and be pro-active in the team too.
2. To be strict yet friendly with the kids is possible.
3. That no matter how naughty these kids are, they meant no harm eventually. (:
4. To take initiative and speak up to strangers. (I'm glad I did that!)
5. That result is not everything. (And now I really understand what it means!)

(:
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Harmoc SL @ CAS

Last 2 days with the kids for the week. Progress was slow.
At the end of this SL, most of them only managed to play Twinkle twinkle little star/ Little Bee.
Had headaches on some occasions, and realised that these kids are quite different from the ones I know in the camp.
So it was quite a challenge.
Shall not rant on the negative experiences though. Not many of it too anyway. :D
Haha, but on the whole it was a unique experience for me.

And a chance to bond with more Harmoc friends. :D

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Saturday, December 5, 2009.

♥ 5 December 2009


Today's International Volunteers Day!
And our class happened to be volunteering for some annual family gathering @ Kallang CC this day. :D
Happy that most of us turned up, though it was real early, at 7.15am!
Was complaining about how tired it was previously...
but when everything was over, I felt all the effort was worth it.
(:

I was in charge of a game called 'On the UFO'
..where families have to step on a paper plate each, and transfer the last paper over to the first person who will then pave the route further to the finishing point.
It's simple, but encourages family bonding.
Saw many spontaneous families who played together.
It seemed sort of a silly game, but it was very comforting to see most parents participating in the activities.
And that could just be one of the most precious quality times spent with the family.
:D

There was buffet lunch (wow!) and some prize presentation.
Followed by a debrief where we shared what we had learned and the strengths and the weaknesses.
As my friend said during debrief, today's event also provided a platform for the class to bond and have a great time together.
Heard that we served about 60 x avg 3 members = 180 people today!


And..
..the most important thing of all today is:
All's well and everyone's happy. :D


"The world is hugged by the faithful arms of volunteers"
-5/12/09

Thursday, December 3, 2009.

♥ 3 December 2009


I bought my electronic keyboard today! :D
Happy happy happy!

I finally see some light in my holiday break..
..especially after these few days of morning calls for school SL!
Buying that keyboard totally brightens up my today.

---

Harmoc SL

Thought I wouldn't enjoy it initially cos I had to wake up so early in the morning and squeezed my way to those organisation centres.
But no doubt, the children/ youths were adorable.
The children at CAS were so full of energy, zest.. and so carefree.

My student was a rather interesting one too.
Telling me about his family, himself, what he knew about zombies and the banana tree that can defeat them...
without realising that we only know each other for just one day.

That's kids. (:


Friday, November 27, 2009.

♥ 27 November 2009


Power of Prayers

Day out with mummy today to Bugis.
Visited the temple there and said my prayers.

Not really sure if these prayers will be answered..
But it's just a belief that you hold, thinking that this will happen someday.
I guess, it will eventually be answered if one prays with sincerity.

And I'm glad I did so today.
Cause I'm holding the belief that the ones that I prayed for will be safe and sound.
The ones that impact my life.

:)












Thursday, November 26, 2009.

♥ 26 November 2009


Harmoc Practices

I always learn something after each harmoc practice.
Like for instance,
I realised that it actually takes confidence for one to blow out the notes out loud and clear.
There's no way for uncertainty... or you'll end up with double notes.
That's probably one problem I have.
Being unsure.

But when I let all these anxieties go and play it as I wish confidently,
the music simply goes on smoothly, in fact, with fewer mistakes too.

That's so like life.
We always worry too much about things that sometimes might not even happen.
And as such, aggravate the situaton further.
---

Having SL project for the upcoming weeks..
Will be teaching harmoc to a little kid at CAS. Haha.
Definitely a nice experience to anticipate.

(:

Wednesday, November 25, 2009.

♥ 25 Novermber 2009


A Nice Encounter

Chanced upon my primary school teacher today.
The teacher who made me write many reflections, run up the stairs, taught us moral values, gave us endless worksheets to complete, made me realise that I can actually top an essay competition (school-base though)...

..but who also the one that had left a significant influence in my life.

Teachers like these are so worth our admiration. (:

Tuesday, November 24, 2009.

♥ 24 November 2009


That's how my brother associates me playing the harmoc at home.
Noise! :D

Hahas.

Monday, November 23, 2009.

♥ 23 Novemeber 2009


Coffee is not my cup of tea.
I always get some weird feelings after drinking them,
though they taste pretty good.

Sunday, November 22, 2009.

♥ 22 November 2009


If only our future is like this..

Unlikely,
because opportunities don't come knocking our doors anymore.

How are you?

.

♥ 22 November 2009




The reason why the skies are amazing. (:

Friday, November 20, 2009.

♥ 20 Novemeber 2009


Okay, I miss camping days. ):
And I cannot be there for this year's, for some medical reasons.
They must be enjoying over at WCP now.
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
I want night cycling!
I want campcraft!
I want adventure race!
I want kayaking!
It'd better be bright and sunny these 3 days..
..or I'd grumble!
):

Looking back, I realised my sec school is all about camps.
I think I probably had 16 camps.
And each one is equally memorable. :D

Okay, I know I have to snap out of this grumpy feeling soon.

---

I thought I saw you today, did I?

Tuesday, November 17, 2009.

♥ 16-17 Novemeber 2009

Just when you think you're the worst ever.. think again. (:

Attended some Emotional & Physical well-being workshop & Resilience workshop for the past 2 days.
It's like a psychology lesson..
Thought about many things while listening to the speakers.
And understood more about myself.

For instance, miscommunications occur because different people use different types of love languages.
There are 5 types.

- Quality time:
You enjoy company and wants your loved ones to be by your side.
- Acts of Services:
You appreciate your loved ones doing the little things for you.
- Words of Affirmation:
You prefer your loved ones to assure you they like you verbally.
- Receiving Gifts:
You like receiving gifts every now and then as an expression of love.
- Physical Touch:
You prefer hugging and kissing to express love.

I suppose I prefer more of the Acts of Services type.
Which one are you?

---
Another interesting one.
I belong to the Self-Indulgent student type.

I tend to
- procrastinate
- have difficulty 'starting' on tasks
- be alright with others taking responsibilities.
(which is so like me nowadays!)

Other 2 types:
Perfectionistic student
- Usually the only child/eldest
- More discipline
- Obliged to be successful

Tensed and Fearful student
- Middle child
- The 'whatever' type
(Couldn't remember why fearful)

---

It's just so amazing how studying psychology can help people understand one another better.
(:

Thursday, November 12, 2009.

♥ 12 November 2009

2012 with Alicia today! :D
It's worth it.
Got me emotional and laughing at some scenes.
It really made me ponder over how I should see some things in life.



I just find this picture very adorable. (:
Like 2 friends catching up with one another.
And 龟龟 on the right is my companion when I'm bored.
I love that smile on his face. (:

Wednesday, November 11, 2009.

♥ 11 November 2009


Badminton! :D
2 hours of fun with my friends after OP.
Tired, but definitely worth it.
It's been some time since I had a game like this.
Since holidays are here (or at least coming soon),
I shall have a game of badminton weekly! :D



Friday, November 6, 2009.

♥ 6 Novemeber 2009



Of all timings, I happen to fall sick now.
Just days before OP.
How.
/:

Flu and sore throat.
The illnesses that I've to avoid for this crucial period.
I can sense the other symptoms creeping in- probably a fever, cough and then...
voiceless.

I don't know what to do now.
It's probably a good excuse for me to speak less. (:
Nothing much to say anyway.
Those who know me will understand why I always don't talk in the morning.
Lols. Not being cool or something. Okay, partly moody cos I don't get my sleep.
And perhaps, just because I don't feel like it.

Okay. Popped some Panadol pills and back to rest. (:

Wednesday, November 4, 2009.

♥ 4 November 2009

All was fine today except for OP rehearsal. I just felt I wasn't prepared enough today. Boo. ):
And PW will be gone after 11 Nov! :D

Okay, back to rehearsal. (:

Tuesday, November 3, 2009.

♥ 3 Novemeber 2009


I got a strong urge to do some DIY stuff now! ):
I shall spend some time enjoying this after OP.
Or maybe I will do so.. before OP?
Hee. (:

Have a thought of doing up a blogshop.
But I've nothing to sell. Lols.



Sunday, November 1, 2009.

♥ 1 November 2009

I just realised.. it's the end of another month.
And the start of another. (:

It's November now.
A year just (almost) passed by.

It's ups and downs for the whole year. Happy times, sad times, uncertain moments.
Hopefully they are all over.

And I can hear Santa's footsteps coming closer to me! :D
The reason why December is a month worth living for.

.

♥ 1 November 2009

Something that happened to me on Friday.

It feels so great to be remembered.
Especially by someone you don't really relate much to in your life.

A chicken rice seller in PHS actually remembered me. (:
I don't remember me patronising her stall that often though.
Yet she could recognise me in another school uniform at NYP canteen.

(:

Friday, October 30, 2009.

♥ 30 October 2009

I've been having many dreams lately.. mostly bad ones though. ):

Here's one I've had this morning/ last night and the meaning I retrieved from a website...

(3) Losing teeth may symbolize a feeling of - or fear of - getting older or impotent or losing sexual attractiveness. Or they may represent a retreat to infancy (when, toothless, you enjoy your mother's breasts and nourishment), and hence a refusal to face reality. Alternatively, they may symbolize the start of a new phase in your life (knocking a tooth out sometimes featured in male initiation rites in mythology)

(4) A bad tooth may represent a painful or rooten part of one's feelings, life or relationships; angry or regretful words.

http://www.experiencefestival.com/meaning_of_dreams_about_teeth_falling_out

I dreamt that my teeth started to drop out one by one when I touched them... those were in the front row somemore! But when I tried smiling.. nobody was concerned or noticing that holes there..

I don't know. It was a weird dream, and a horrifying. And the meaning of the dream is sort of true about my thoughts right now. I can't believe this.

I wonder when will I ever get out of all these dreams.. I need my sleep! :(

Wednesday, October 21, 2009.

♥ 21 October 2009

Release of results.
This time, I didn't cry. Not at all.
Maybe I expected it. Maybe because I have been crying too much this year. Maybe I was just too numb by all these.

All along I had this feeling that 2009's a dream to me.
Right from the start of school, I didn't feel like I was living a life I wanted.

I don't know.
I just felt I'm a disappointment to those who believe I can, even if they didn't say much.

I'm sorry.

Sunday, October 11, 2009.

♥ 11 October 2009

Life has been ups and downs recently.
So much I want to say, but they go off as fast as they come to my mind.

At times, I feel like I'm Rochester.
Not knowing who holds the truth.
Who is the one I should listen to.

Weekend's a break that I spent with my family and I learnt something.
That no matter what happens, home is the place I can head to.
Family is the one whom I can trust on.

And no matter what happens, family love does remain strong. (:

Wednesday, October 7, 2009.

♥


I feel like doing this now. :D

.

♥ 7 October 2009

I hate this feeling.
I feel it coming.
I don't want to be Rochester in WSS.



Not knowing whose words to believe.
:(

Tuesday, October 6, 2009.

♥ 6 October 2009

100th post (:

I survived Econs and Geog at one go today!
Though I think that I won't be doing well, I know.

Something made my day. I bought "Tombstone for Fireflies" home finally! (:
It's my childhood fave, now too.
And no matter how many times I watch, I always cry.

Okay. Back to studies. 2 more days.

Monday, October 5, 2009.

♥ 5 October 2009

I know I sounded annoying to say this..
But I really had a bad omen that I wouldn't be able to promote.
It's just so different.
The lack of confidence in exam.. not even a tiny weeny bit left.
Was so accustomed to exams all these years.. I thought perhaps I could handle them this time..
But no. It failed me.
I knew I under-performed.
I could stare blankly in space for some time during the exam.
I hate this feeling.
But it came back to me just like how it occurred in me during common test.
After saying all the crap that I'm not bothered by promos.. who would want to bring home a lousy result slip at the end of the day?
I had thoughts of leaving, because these few months weren't enjoyable.
It just feels so numb.
Studying studying studying.
Maybe that wasn't where I should head off in the first place.
I don't know.
I just wish to get it over and done with.
That one week of intensive revision with Wan Ting was great.
But I don't think it'd help me in anyway for this exam.

For the very first time, I had absolutely no confidence in the exam and I know I'm heading doom.

Perhaps, by 29 April 2010 (flashforward!) , I would have been elsewhere.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009.

♥ 24 September 2009

It's the same plot that anyone would expect, but I fell for it nevertheless.

"P.S I'm Sorry" on Channel U got me into tears again last night.
This time, it was a father and son story.
The father didn't let his son step into the house after the son left the home on spite.
Even when the son realised his mistakes and has repented, the dad is persistent in not letting him back home.

The host then requested to meet the dad and chatted with him over the son.
And when the son later went back to the house to knock at that door once again.. the door opened after some tries!
Oh my. That scene of the son stepping into the house once again.. the acceptance of his dad... and the possible reactions when they met after so many years.. it's just so touching. (:

And indeed, capturing the scene of the son entering the house again was definitely worth more than their joyous expressions of reunion.

Sweet happy ending. (:

Monday, September 21, 2009.

♥ 21 September 2009

Stress stress stress!

I can feel it's coming. 14 days more. Aww. The tensed feeling is back. And it's horrible. ):

Friday, September 4, 2009.

♥ 4 Sep 2009!

Yeah! :D
Holidays are here finally.
It's gonna be a busy mugging week, but at least it's a short break away from school.
Much has happened lately, but rather lazy to update...


My loveable class. (:
The GPictionary that made me laughed till I started tearing during GP! :D

Track's OOB (out of bounds)!
Which means, no running! :D
I like running though. Lol.

And not forgetting, gathering with 3/4 Faith 07/08! (:


Another term ended.
So much has happened. Time has passed so quickly.
GP teacher, Lit teacher & PW teacher are all leaving.
Just when we were used to having them around,
they are going off.
They are all great, inspiring teachers that made my JC life better. :D
Thank you!

Tuesday, September 1, 2009.

♥ 28/8-1/9

It's a mixture of feelings these few days.
I don't really know how to express it.

The nostalgic feeling of being with 3/4 Faith 07/08 once again..
the happiness from seeing the familiar faces & places..
the slight feeling of neglect from the surroundings..
and the disappointment in me.

Out of nowhere, I had this feeling in me that I'm one who tends to be easily forgotten by others.
So, I started recalling the possible things that I had done in that past that might have left some impressions..
but there wasn't any significant ones sadly. ):

Maybe it's alright to be imperfect at times.
Because nobody remembers the perfect ones on stage, but the one who falls and makes himself a fool.

Friday, August 21, 2009.

♥ 21 August 2009

Suddenly, I realise many things which I might otherwise still be clueless about.

I realise
...that I don't really look closely at everything around me at times.
...that I tend to take things for granted at times.
...that I am rather naive in certain issues.
...that there is no completely right or wrong answers in life.
...that there is no ugly people in this world.
...that I don't really mean it when I say I dislike harmoc (in fact, I think I'm enjoying it at times)
...that I still have many things that I want to do not yet done.

...and that life isn't really that bad afterall. (at least for now)

Okay. School days are getting better though busier. The company of friends is the key factor here. Days of laughter that flushes away our pressure. Thank you!

And so, life is really not so bad afterall! (:

Thursday, August 20, 2009.

♥


Something random. Haha. I think I fall under table 2 or table 9. :D

Tuesday, August 18, 2009.

♥ 18 Aug 2009

After tomorrow, those numbers would become history. ):

How much I really really hate experiencing C-H-A-N-G-E-S.
Why can't we just be who we are, doing what we want, staying at what we have?

It's just numbers, yes, but the ones that I've been pressing for 17 years.
Grown accustomed to it over the years, yet now I have to part with it.

If there's one thing I can change in life, I would remove change. (negative change preferably)
And this I would call it positive change.

Friday, June 19, 2009.

♥ 19 June 2009

I feel so trapped in it.
I think I'm really not okay right now.
For one more day I'm still not convinced, I'll still live in this cycle.
I guess I'll only be okay once I sort everything out,
and be convinced of my decisions.
Preferably not in the mean time.

I'm sorry if I don't look too friendly at times.
I'm just being myself? (:

Wednesday, June 17, 2009.

♥ 17 June 2009

I don't know what I'm hanging on to.
It's becoming so meaningless.
What's past has passed.
I shouldn't trap myself in it.
But it seems that I'm the only one who hasn't got out of it.
Why?


Saturday, June 6, 2009.

♥ 6 June 2009

Am I the one pushing everything away,
or am I the one being pushed away?

It just feels so black out there.

Monday, June 1, 2009.

♥ 1 June 2009

My childhood faves! (:
Familiar? Haha. (:
If I have a chance, I wouldn't mind going back to the past for one more time.

Ninja Turtles
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90Tueundpyk

Power Rangers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nX2Uqnc7v9I


































Thursday, May 7, 2009.

♥ 7 May 2009

It's when we lost it that we start to cherish.
Yet, all else will become history
and what lies ahead for us would be
another new road worth discovering.

Sunday, April 19, 2009.

♥ 19 April 2009

Awww. I feel like giving it all up.
Dull routine. I hate it.
It's a never-ending process.
Each day of school is like #&@*!(#(!.
I find no meaning there.
And this feeling just doesn't get away
even after months.

Yet, tomorrow, all will be back to square-one once again.
Lectures, tutorials, tests, marks, grades.
A repeat of everything for yet another week.
How anticipating.



Saturday, April 4, 2009.

♥ 4 April 2009

Something random.
Familiar? Haha! (:

3 April 2009
TGIF! Went back to PHS to collect SGC, and dropped by to see NP. (:
Sec1Squad'09 (:
Future leaders of PHSNPCC. Cool.
I was just like them 4 years back. (:

Sec1Squad'05. Spot me! (:

W/CI & Me! (:

How I miss it so much...!
TD, CC, Camps, Pumpings, R&B, PT, Drills!
Till now, I've yet to get used to sitting in the air-conditioned room for 3hours, playing harmoc continuously. Lols.



4 April 2009 (:
Hmm, I did CIP for almost the whole day? Lol, nowadays, only CIP has made my life slightly better from the dull school life in JC. Haha. Pathetic right, it's been so long since i went to town. ):

Morning was tuition programme @ yishun.
And I taught my child Fractions for Math, and did antonyms & cloze passages for English!
Though I had to wake up early, the time spent was definitely worth it- when you know that you are making a difference to someone's life. (:

Then was Project Deliver Me CIP under NLB with Sarah.
And I was late for an hour when I was supposed to meet her at 11.15am. Sorry once again!
It was a nice experience, cos I feel that I'm more open-minded now after meeting so many new people here and there through CIP.

We had to travel to 3 places, and they ain't near to one another somemore!
We travelled from Bugis to Boon Lay, then to Woodlands, then to Bukit Merah before the Uncle alighted us at Tiong Bahru MRT. Lol. What a day!


The NLB Bag with the books. (:

The folder with all the details of the places we need to go to. (:

Sarah & Me. (:
There's another volunteer with us too. And we were the only group doing the afternoon shift. Lol.


Life was easy cos we had this kind taxi driver who drove us around the places.
Thank you Uncle Sim!
And there's the other volunteer sitting in front of us. (:

And I rewarded myself after a long day with this- Cup Corn! My favourite! :D

I didn't help out with class preparation for the carnival today. Felt so bad now cos on the whole, I didn't really contribute much. Okay. Shall work doubly hard for tomorrow! Reporting time- 7am. Goodness!

Is this another trap?